The Detroit Lions moved to 8-6 on the season as they beat the Chicago Bears (4-10) for the second time this year. This was a really boring game…….on a Saturday. I was sick…..sicker than a dog…..why do people say that?……because dogs are always sick and gross? Don’t mind me. I think my illness made me write a really bad post here. Tru dat! (By the way, this would be a terrific nickname for Mitch Trubisky if he played for New Orleans!) I had a fever and a head cold so maybe that’s why I couldn’t see the TV clearly. So blame Rx and 3 straight days of cabin fever for this stinky writing. Nobody wants to read this anyway so who really cares. But you know, we’re doing it for longevity sake. So that there’s a record of this game. So that I can prove to myself (actually everybody else) I wrote both a preview and a recap of each and every game this season, actually two years in a row now. So that I could keep my streak alive. Snapchat streaks!
(Did anyone actually read the paragraph above? If so, I thank you. I also commend you.) Uh oh, here we go again! I laud and magnify your Glorious name, evermore praising you and saying, “Hosannah in the highest, heaven and earth are full of your glory “. Am I committing sin right now? Is this “taking the name of the Lord thy God in vain?” I hope not. But if so, I ask for forgiveness. This is my confession, so to speak. “Lord, I pray to thee to take away the sin of the world, in thy name, Amen!” (I slept through church on Sunday with said fever. This shall be my…..atonement). However, I hope the reverend doesn’t read the “Dutch Lion”. This would be, how do you say, embarrassment?
Jesus, if you’re reading my columns, please disregard the above paragraph. And I’m not talking to you Jesus (that guy that works in the back of the local ‘On The Border’ Mexican restaurant pronounced “Hay-zeus”). Now let’s get back to football, shall we?………..And the Lord took the bread and he broke it saying……….Take….Eat!
“Oh Harry, just let the man eat his Communion in Peace!” “Did someone say ‘peace’? or ‘Piece’? I don’t know. Or is it, I don’t NO!” (I really feel empathy for that dude from Bangladesh who always “likes” my posts because he probably reads them to learn English. Then I go and butcher the entire language for him. He’s gotta be pulling his hair out, or his “hare” out!) Not sure they have rabbits in Bangladesh. TEASER! Speaking of rabbits, check out Bugs Bunny toward the end of this post! SOMEBODY STOP ME!
PS Will I be banned from WordPress after this post is published? Not sure…..did somebody say “BAND?” Banned or revered….probably at least one, but maybe not for decades. It’s a post like this that gets those politicians in hot water when they run for office in 2036. Well, I think you know what I mean, or meant. (This post has derailed for the better part of a half hour now. That’s writing time. Not reading time, luckily. This post actually reminds me of a “Breaking News!” news flash I caught this morning while in a daze. I think I heard there was a train derailment in Washington, USA. Sorry about that if that’s true. Should I delete that? Too late.) See what I mean about getting banned and politicians and hot water and….just everything? Oh forget it! Let’s go ahead and award some Game Balls!
Game Balls
OLB #99 Lamarr Houston – Houston had 3 tackles and 2 sacks against Lions QB Matt Stafford. That’s 4 sacks in 3 games for Houston since he came back to Chicago as a mercenary. Not bad.
CB #23 Kyle Fuller – Quietly, Fuller has had a really good season. It will be interesting to see how GM Ryan Pace handles his upcoming free agency (He’s in his 4th year so he’s eligible for a new contract this offseason).
Player of the Game
S #39 Eddie Jackson – He was one of the few Bears that played well. He posted 8 tackles and a fumble recovery. It seemed like he was all over the field making plays. He missed an interception though, or even a PBU when Lions WR Marvin “Shade Tree” Jones leaped high to catch a long ball for 58 yards on 3rd and 18. Other than that, Jackson was really good.
Predictions Recap
In our Preview last week, we wrote:
“The “Dutch Lion” is calling for a close game. Who will win? It’s anyone’s guess. He’ll call it a Bears victory against the spread (ATS) but a Detroit victory straight up (S/U).
Detroit Lions 23 Chicago Bears 22″
RESULT: Detroit Lions 20 Chicago Bears 10
It was somewhat close but Detroit won both S/U and ATS.
Bears Record : 4-10
Dutch Lion’s Record : 7-7
Praise God if you got through all that verbal crap soup. My apologies………..Showtime at the Apollo……..geez! Did I just create a new homonym? Not sure. My wretched virus-brain is swarming with words. Gotta go now. Need Rx…….stat. What does “stat” mean? Oh brother. It never stops. Someday my psychologist will read this, and the day after I’ll be admitted to the looney bin via the paddy wagon. Did someone say “looney”? At least I’ll be able to watch Looney Tunes all day. I love Looney Tunes. Need Rx……..stat, or now would be good. Goodbye for now……or ever.
So long, Dutch 😉